Sharon's Relationship with Doris

[Deleted]

One of the more interesting aspects of Sharon's life (I think) is her relationship with her mother.  The information I have is very limited, but by all accounts they were very close. Since Sharon's father was in the service, and Sharon was an only child for the first 10 years of her life, I would imagine mother and daughter had a unique bond.

While reading Greg King's book, Sharon Tate and the Manson Murders, some of Sharon's old beau's had some negative things to say about Doris. If I recall, Phillipe Forquet thought Doris was mercenary and very meddling. I believe Roman also thought Doris was meddling. I honestly don't know how accurate those assessments are since maybe Doris was just trying to be protective of her daughter? 

Anyway, I was wondering what everyone else's opinion on Doris and Sharon's relationship was like, and if you had any interesting information to share. Thanks!

[Kristen]

I think Doris was a very concerned mother, more than a meddlesome one--and for very good reason.

Doris and Paul were very young when Sharon was born, and since he was away in the service for so long, Doris' life absolutely revolved around Sharon for a decade until Debra was born.Then, because the family moved around so much, Sharon didn't build a lot of close friendships, so she would have relied on her mother a lot for friendship. I think part of the reason Doris encouraged Sharon to participate in pageants was because she wanted Sharon to build up her confidence and spend more time around girls her own age, outside of school. I don't think Doris ever had the intention of Sharon becoming an actress. I think she figured that after the teenage pageants were done, Sharon would go off to college and eventually meet someone and settle down, raise a family.

When Sharon went off to Hollywood the first time, Doris basically had a nervous breakdown and Sharon had to go back home. Even by the early '60s there were hortor stories about Hollywood being written about. Actresses being abused by managers and directors. Marilyn Monroe's death was huge news, and when stories about what was happening in her personal life started coming out, it shocked people. Even before Marilyn you had tragedies of actresses like Mabel Normand. Doris was afraid for Sharon, and for good reason. Sharon was her baby and best friend, it only makes sense that she would want to be involved in her daughter's life. There was a story published in either '66 or '67 where it touched on their relationship when Sharon visited home, and Doris' big thing was making sure that Sharon was taking care of her body and getting enough iron and vitamins.

Doris also had reasons to be concerned about Philippe and Roman. Philippe hit Sharon to the point that she had to be hospitalized. Roman had a wandering eye and would have relations with other women. I'm sure Doris knew about his cheating because she and Sharon were so close. Roman was also nearly a decade Sharon's senior. Doris probably thought he was too old for her. Even though Jay Sebring was about the same age as Roman, there wasn't the infidelity issue as much. Plus since Jay had served in the military, like Paul, she probably held him in high regard.

[Deleted]

I think Doris was very protective of Sharon.

In the Kindle version of Restless Souls (yes, I bought THAT book), there is an component where you can listen to audio clips of Doris and Sharon talking. It is interesting to listen to. Doris is asking Sharon how much money Roman is making on a certain film and she then asks Sharon how much she will earn from that. That does seem like meddling, but I just think Doris wanted to know Sharon was financially secure. As Sharon put it she herself was "broke, but mentally rich". The audio is a message Sharon is leaving for her father and Doris is in the background asking Sharon certain questions. I can see how to some that would come across as annoying, but I know many mothers like that.

I also agree with everything Kristen said above. Doris had Sharon at 19 and her husband was gone a lot. Sharon was all she had for many years and even after she had Debra and Patti, Sharon was still the center of her universe.

[Deleted]

Thanks for the replies! I'm really intrigued by the audio files you mentioned, Sav. I wonder if there are more files like that available. I have not read Restless Souls since I only recently heard about it - as well as the revelations about Alisa Statsman and Brie Tate - so I tended to steer clear of that book.

I also agree with you both that Doris comes across to me as more concerned than meddling. I do think it's interesting that Phillipe and Roman seem to be the only two who have had negative remarks about Doris. That seems revealing to me - more of them than Doris.  

[Kristen]

I think part of Philippe's remarks came as a little bit of revenge against Doris. After Sharon died the police interviewed her parents to see if they could think of anyone who'd want to hurt Sharon, and Doris brought up Philippe. He was the only person she knew of who had ever actually done any physical harm to Sharon. Doris probably wanted him arrested after he abused her, but because of careers and publicity, it was decided to not press charges. People in the industry knew what happened though, and his career in America was over. Even though the incident had occurred 5 years earlier, it was still something on Doris' mind.


When it comes to Roman, I honestly don't think he had any sort of experience with a family that was so tight-knit. His life growing up was basically the opposite of Sharon's, and the holocaust destroyed so much of his family. I don't really know anything about his first marriage apart from her deciding to leave the marriage, and the hurt that caused him. So from that point until Sharon came into his life, he didn't have any serious relationships. Thus, he didn't deal with the parents of any girlfriends. I tend to think of Roman as someone who doesn't want to answer to anyone or compete for attention. So when he and Sharon became an official/serious couple, he was a little surprised by just how close Doris and Sharon were.

All of that being said though, I think Sharon did come to slightly resent just how involved Doris wanted to be. Sharon had to assert her independence more, because she was an adult woman. I honestly believe that Doris wanted Sharon at the family home in the summer of '69 while she was pregnant, and tried to talk her into staying there. Sharon however, felt that she'd be able to be fine in her own home, even though Roman was away. As much as she loved and adored her mother, Doris would have driven her a little nuts. Completely removing what eventually happened from the equation, because Sharon had zero control over it, Sharon did just fine in her own home.